They've seen it all—from real-life subway surfers to raccoons on the rails—and they have thoughts
14 Secrets Your Train Conductor Won’t Tell You
Updated on May 29, 2025
Not letting people off before you get on should be punishable by international law
OK, maybe it’s not technically in the Geneva Conventions—but it should be. Storming the train the moment the doors open is the transit equivalent of trying to push your way into an elevator while people are still inside: rude, chaotic and deeply uncivilized—and it’s the top pet peeve of both our train conductors.
According to Leonard, this move earns you the title of most annoying passenger (congrats!). And it’s not just about manners. Grattan says it’s also a serious safety hazard. Crowding the door blocks people from exiting, creates bottlenecks and increases the risk of falls, shoves and “accidental” elbow jabs from fed-up commuters. “It also just slows the process down, you’re not going to get there faster by getting on the train faster,” Grattan says. “But people do this all the time—it’s like they just can’t help themselves.”
Holding the doors open is not a heroic act
Despite what your ego tells you, you’re not saving lives, you’re just delaying the train. “Every second the doors stay open longer than scheduled causes delays down the line,” Leonard says. “Plus, those doors can really hurt.”
“I know you think you absolutely have to make this train, but there’s almost always another train coming right after this one, just wait,” Grattan says. So if someone’s running behind you, wish them luck and move on. This isn’t an airport rom-com, and the train will not wait for love.
Near the doors is not the best place to stand
That spot by the doors might seem convenient, but it’s also prime real estate for thieves. “If you’re going to get pickpocketed or have your phone snatched, it’s probably going to happen there, because they can grab your stuff and jump off right as the doors close,” says Grattan. It’s like a magic trick, but with way worse vibes.
Want to stay safer? Move to the middle of the car, keep your valuables out of sight and try to keep your back to a wall or a seat, Grattan says. “Try not to let people press up against your back—they’re either trying to steal your phone or do something worse, especially if you’re a woman,” he says.
Not every train has a conductor
Here’s a surprising train conductor secret: Contrary to what cartoons may have taught you, not every train has a conductor. Subways and commuter trains usually do, Leonard says, but some light rail and high-speed systems are fully automated. Don’t worry—if there’s no conductor, there’s still someone (or something) keeping things on track. “The systems are well programmed, even most of the announcements are automated,” Leonard reassures us, adding that this is also why it’s not a huge deal if the conductor falls asleep. Also …
“Conductor” isn’t code for “engineer”
Train conductors don’t actually drive the train. That’s the engineer’s job. “The train engineer is the one who gets to drive the train, stays at the controls and sounds the horn,” explains Leonard.
So what does the conductor do? Think of them as the bossy older sibling of the train crew—making sure everything runs smoothly. They check tickets, make announcements, handle delays, wrangle confused or disruptive passengers, and keep the train on schedule. They’re the point person for both the crew and the public. If there’s chaos in Car 5, they’re the one who deals with it. And while the engineer gets the glory (and the horn), the conductor’s the one keeping the peace and the schedule.
You can flag down a train
Just like Superman, you technically have the power to stop a train in its tracks. “Waving anything side to side is the signal to the driver to stop the train, and they will do it,” says Grattan. “Ideally, you wave a flashlight or your phone light, but just your arms will work too.”
But before you go full superhero, use this power wisely. This is not a shortcut to catch a missed ride. The train won’t stop because you’re late, or because you swear you left your new AirPods on board. It’s reserved for serious emergencies—like a person on the tracks, a fire or something that genuinely endangers lives. Misuse it, and at best, you’ll delay everyone. At worst, you’ll end up in serious legal trouble (and do you really want to star in a viral video titled “This Guy Stopped a Train for a Burrito”?).
The safest place to ride is with the conductor
Nervous about riding the train at night? Worried you won’t know which stop to get off at? Want to make a new friend with a cool badge? Head for the conductor car. “The safest place on the train is usually where the conductor is stationed,” says Grattan. They’re great at giving directions (“just don’t interrupt them when they’re speaking into the PA system”), and bad behavior tends to mysteriously vanish when people realize someone with a uniform and a radio is nearby.
So if you’re trying to avoid creeps, make sure you don’t miss your stop or are just sick of louder-than-life TikToks, ride near the conductor. It’s like first-class for common sense.
Conductors see things they can’t unsee
Between people jumping or falling onto the tracks and medical emergencies onboard, train conductors and transit workers witness more trauma than most commuters realize. “If you work on a train long enough, chances are very high you’ll see someone die,” says Grattan. “Unfortunately, a lot of my train stories end pretty gruesomely, so I don’t tell those.”
These aren’t just passing moments, they leave a mark. Conductors may seem calm and collected, but that calm often comes from experience—sometimes devastating experience, Leonard says. “They’re hard to forget,” he says.
Conductors can make a good living
Train conductor jobs may not come with capes or theme music, but they do come with solid paychecks. Entry-level conductors typically start at around $20 an hour, depending on the region and whether they’re working passenger or freight. But stick with it, rack up some experience, and especially if you’re running freight or long-haul routes, you could be pulling in $100,000-plus a year, including overtime. “They’re usually good union jobs too,” says Leonard. “Great benefits, pension and job security, but the work-life balance is zero.” Long shifts, unpredictable schedules and overnight hauls are par for the course. “My dog likes my neighbor more than me at this point,” he says.
Yes, they judge your manspreading
It’s a train, not your living room. “Taking up more than one seat is one of the biggest reasons people get into fights on the subway,” Grattan says. Whether it’s the classic bag-on-the-seat trick or a full-on manspreading power pose, you’re not just annoying your fellow passengers—you’re also ticking off the conductors and transit cops who have to deal with the fallout.
It’s not about legroom, it’s about basic respect, Grattan says. That extra seat could go to an elderly rider, a pregnant commuter or literally anyone who doesn’t want to play a round of “thigh chicken” with a total stranger. So keep your knees in your lane, put your bag on your lap and avoid being the reason someone snaps during rush hour. Transit staff are watching—and yes, they’re judging.
That “technical delay” is sometimes just a guy named Bob
“Signal issues” and “track congestion” sound official, but sometimes the train is delayed because someone forgot their lunch, a raccoon is too close to the rail or Bob parked the maintenance vehicle like an idiot. We’re not naming names, but … it was Bob. “And I’m the one who has to figure out how to explain it in a way that sounds official and reassuring,” Leonard says.
“You’d be amazed at the random things we’ve had to stop trains for, like real-life subway surfers, chasing clout,” Grattan adds. It’s true, people will actually climb on top of the train car and try to run, just like in the video game. “Absolutely do not do this, you could die,” he says. (And you won’t regenerate lives like you do in the game.)
They wish you wouldn’t encourage subway performers
Yes, the dancing, drumming and impromptu pole gymnastics can be entertaining. And yes, the guy doing pull-ups on the overhead bar is technically an athlete. But transit workers ask that you don’t reward performers or panhandlers with cash. “It’s against the rules to solicit money on the train, we got a lot of complaints about that,” says Grattan, “and giving money only encourages more of it—often in unsafe or disruptive ways.”
Even seemingly harmless performances can cause injuries, delays or fights when things go sideways (and they often do). If you want to support the arts, there are safer places than a moving metal tube packed with 200 tired commuters.
They hate your music
“Speaker” scum isn’t just on airplanes. “People have no shame, they’ll play music, watch videos and Facetime at full volume on their phones,” Grattan says. “That will make you enemies really fast.”
Unfortunately, that type of thing is generally up to the conductor to enforce, Leonard says. “I try to be polite, but what I really want to say is ‘I hate your music, you have terrible taste, shut up,'” he says. “What I actually say is, ‘Thank you so much for riding with us, but let’s use our inside voices and volume to respect the other passengers.” Being a conductor is 50% logistics, 50% kindergarten teacher with a microphone.
Those “abandoned” trains aren’t broken
Ever see a train just sitting on an unused track and assume it’s broken or retired? Actually, Grattan says, during severe weather—snowstorms, hurricanes or extreme heat—trains are often moved onto side tracks or storage yards to protect them from damage. It’s like putting your car in the garage, except your garage is five miles long.
But there’s a downside: Parked trains become prime targets for vandals, he says. Graffiti artists, thrill-seekers and general mischief-makers see a motionless train as an open invitation. Transit workers spend hours removing graffiti and repairing damage before the trains can return to service. So next time you see a train just chilling out—don’t worry. It’s not ghosted, it’s just on weather-related PTO.
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Sources:
- Paul Grattan, sergeant and member of the NYPD Transit Bureau; phone interview, May 21, 2025
- Josh Leonard (name has been changed), current Amtrak conductor; phone interview, May 20, 2025
